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Joe Ovies

A playlist to keep LeBron James in Miami

Posted July 9, 2014

We're all living in LeBron James' world right now, and there is no way to escape his gravitational pull.

Hours of programming have been filled up with organizational and individual propaganda relayed through the media via ubiquitous "sources." Each camp is doing its best to sell optimism or influence the outcome of a decision only James can make in the end.

Source: James had dinner in Vegas with Dwyane Wade, enjoyed delicious sea bass and ended the night in the club.

Source: James had a meeting with Nike in Las Vegas.

Source: 90 percent chance James returns to Cleveland.

Source: Chris Bosh could take max deal in Houston, allowing Heat to pursue Carmelo Anthony.

Source: Chris Bosh told Houston he wanted to be in Miami and play with James.

Source: Danny Granger and Josh McRoberts signed with Miami under assumption James will be teammate.

Source: 75% chance James wears jeans today.

Source: 30% chance it will rain in Raleigh today, could alter James decision.

Source: Everyone is sourced out and ready for James to make a decision.

Are we having fun yet?

I'll admit, the onslaught of sourced information has breached my mental wall. From the beginning of this entire process, I believed James would stay in Miami.

But now I'm starting to entertain the possibility of James returning to Cleveland and everything that would mean for all parties involved, and I hate myself for it. I've fallen for the completely meaningless percentages thrown around as though they have a true read on James' thought process.

Perhaps Miami Heat president Pat Riley is starting to sweat those details as well. He's cooking up roster moves, tweaking contractual payouts and ironing out any other issues in an effort to keep James in Miami.

I'm here to help you, Mr. Riley.

Music is the key to keeping your relationship with James intact. Music sets the mood and has persuasive effects. Hit James with some Al Green and Jodeci. Show James how much he means to you with Boyz II Men and P.M. Dawn. Light a few candles in the meeting room, lock eyes with James and let Drake do the rest.

James won't leave you, Riley. He'll remember all the good times and understand the future can hold so much more. Here's the playlist that will guarantee everlasting love.

15 Comments

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  • Itsmyopinion67 Jul 14, 2014

    Wonder where LeBron will go?

  • JACKSON SAWYER REVENGE Jul 12, 2014

    hate to bust your bubble but for most of the people their life doesn't revolve around what or what not L James does, only media types and radio clowns are spinning in circles on what a BB OR FB player does!!

  • Doc Holliday Jul 10, 2014

    View quoted thread



    +1...me too.

  • NothingButNet Jul 10, 2014

    View quoted thread



    Actually, I think he meant LeBron. Toddler has been saying that LeBron loves all this attention.

    I thought LeBron was going to stay at Miami, but recent reports have him going back "home". Whatever the case, I hope the LeDrama is over soon.

  • Hammerhead Jul 10, 2014

    View quoted thread



    "We" means the media. They can't stop talking about it.

  • Doc Holliday Jul 9, 2014

    "We're all living in LeBron James' world right now, and there is no way to escape his gravitational pull."

    Negative! LeBron's biggest fan?

    Go Spurs!

  • roberttherugguy Jul 9, 2014

    Top of the playlist: Shabazz Napier. Lebron you asked for him you got him.

  • Hammerhead Jul 9, 2014

    View quoted thread



    LOL. I tried to listen to the World's Strongest Smelling Morning Show this morning and it sounded like an ex-jock version of The View.

  • billybob72 Jul 9, 2014

    He's not leaving the Heat. This is just a ploy to get big money so he won't have to do ads in his retirement like Shaq. He took a cut the first time in order to put together a great team, but this time the Big 3 are looking after themselves. Miami will not let them go, but the lack of funds will result in a weaker bench and poor depth that will cost them in the long run, especially against deep teams like the Spurs. Seems they didn't heed the lesson learned in the finals.

  • lewiskr45 Jul 9, 2014

    View quoted thread


    I think he meant ovies

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